Making Emotional Art

Sometimes, I feel like I am losing my voice in my art, mainly because of dealing with the grief of losing my parents so close to one another, cleaning out their house, and then having major surgery.  It has taken me aback some.  I have signs all over my studio reminding me about who I am, words of encouragement that I hope will help me scrape myself up off the curb of life and get me to where I am going.  But, it is challenging, to say the least.

I know that I have a voice in my art, but feeling that it is a bit on the weak side right now. 

Please read this thoughtful post from Kelly Rae Roberts about your voice here

Soon after my dad passed away, I started making prayer flags, for my own healing,and grief, sort of channeling my art.  That was all I needed at the time, was to make something small.

Then we moved our mother into an assisted living facility, where she passed away three months later

Then I joined The Prayer Flag Project  Making these small pieces of art has helped me get my mojo back, art-wise over the last year and a half.

My deadlines are fast approaching, and for one of the projects, I have contemplated doing a quilt about my parents.  The last song my mother sang was "Always."  I asked myself over and over again if I could really do it?  Am I ready to tackle such a highly emotional subject?

  I had saved a few pieces of their clothing.  So, my idea was to make a smaller version of what I had first envisioned.  My sister's birthday was coming up, and I knew she would really love a small quilt about mom and dad.  Small quilt, tons of emotions.  It was a struggle, and at one point, I almost gave up altogether.

 I had a lovely photograph of them, when they were both pretty healthy, and I needed to re-dress them in their own clothing.  The words to the chorus of the song "I'll be loving you always" is a photo transfer on chiffon over a light background.  My mom is wearing fabric from one of her jackets.  Okay, yes, it was hard to cut it up, but it will live on in this quilt.

For some reason, blogger is being quite disagreeable today, and won't let me put a caption under the next photo.  I could not use my dad's Hawaiian shirts, because the prints were too big, but this fabric reminded me of him, and they compliment each other.

The finished art quilt for my sister.  I was determined to just get it done.  However, I came to the conclusion that I am not ready to tackle a larger quilt with this subject in mind.  It was very difficult, and this piece sort of stunned me, for about three days, and I could not do anything but this, think about my parents, talked to them over the course of those days, and cried my heart out.  Maybe sometime, I can tackle this again, but not right now.  It was a learning experience, to say the least.  My sister loved her gift, and we both cried.  I'll be loving them always. Onward I go.